And she shall be nameth.....

Eunice's first Christmas pressie from Aunty Ting and Uncle Da

Sorry guys, you have been promoted..no jie jie or kor kor...

We're going to hang this frame on her bedroom door.

See what we bought for you

Couldn't help it but bought a few sets of clothing for her even though I know she will outgrow them very fast.

A romper

My personal favourite with the girlie skirt

Woohoo....time flies and I am into my last trimester, 32 weeks and 5 days to be exact.

There had been many changes since the last time I blogged. Gosh, that was 4 months ago!!

Christmas at work is very different this year. Last year at this time, we were discussing and exchanging gift exchange ideas. All the hush-hush and shoosh shoosh.... there were 4 of us exchanging pressies with much anticipation and girlish giggles. It seems quite empty this year, although it still feels like Christmas with the pouring rain.

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It hasn't been easy getting up for work every morning. Every movement now required extra effort. I realised over the weekend the most comfortable position for me is to lie down. I keep looking at the calendar every day, wondering when I will pop. Seriously, I am looking forward so that I can get away from work for some time. Maybe he's right - I'm having a holiday.

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Baby's father has been real sweet these past few months. His greatest strength is his patience and attentiveness towards me and 'Nice-nice'. I had been catching him looking at girls nowadays. Ha, don't get me wrong.....young little toddler girls. He looks at them adoringly, wondering if his own little girl would be like that too. The 'manja', doe-eyed look, 'Papa, carry me!' Trust me, if 'Nice-nice' utters that, he will immediately scoop her up into his arms.

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'Nice-nice' has been kicking me more frequently now. Not that I am complaining, but I will miss her gymnastic movements in me once she is out. I wonder how she will look like - wavy hair like me, big panda eyes like her dad, big nose like mine........

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There're so much to look forward and equally much trepidation. For now, I'm just taking each day as it comes.

Late nights late nights!

Being a mother, am I expected to sacrifice my job and be a dutiful mum? Knock off on the dot, rush to pick up baby. Everything revolves around the family. My job can take second or third place, whatever.

What about the father? He can just concentrate on his job, knock off late and give us the leftovers of his time and energy.

The paradigm of a family unit should shift. Balance is the key. Not just because I am the mother, I am expected to give more. We are no longer living in the past era of our parents where the father brings home the bacon while the mother takes care of everything in the house and does everything at the bidding of the 'head of the household'.

Why am I ranting away like this? When I first brought up the issue of going away for a conference next April. He objected without thinking. All right, I understand where you are coming.

But now, he has been working late, giving us the remains. I don't even want that. Take it away. It stinks! Not even an sms or call during the day to find how how Little Pea and I are doing. Work work work, is all you think about.

And when Little Pea arrives, I have to sacrifice mine. I am still going to be a worker - being a mum or not. Of course, my personal priorities will change.

How about yours?!?

10 weeks

I'm growing bigger, but getting more comfortable with my weight gain.

By the end of this week, Little Pea will have verifiable fingers and toes. The tadpole appearance diminishes as the tail completely disappears. Eyelids fuse and will stay shut until weeks 25 to 27. Both the external ear and upper lip are complete, and the beginnings of external genitalia appear. The average size of our baby-to-be is 27 to 35 millimeters, crown to rump. Our little one weighs in at a hefty four grams!

Exciting or what?! Little Pea will soon have to be called 'Little Cherry' because he/she is growing. I'm beginning to love Little Pea more and more. Can't wait to kiss and hug him/her.

3 June 2006

Little did we expect this blue sign
















We had a double celebration that evening. I was glad to see everyone tucking into the food heartily. Week after week, I hear complaints from Grandma and Dad about Mum. I was getting sick and tired of their complaints. But today, we chatted happily while breaking crab pincers and lifting juicy meat off the crayfish shell.

Fellowship of ring has broken

217 days or 7 months 1 week after the wedding, he lost THE wedding band!!!!!!!

It was a matter of time that his wedding ring got lost. I have lost count of the number of times he forgot to wear it out. Sometimes he remembered or I saw the bare left 4th finger when we stepped out of the lift. This was already fortunate. He just had to go back to get it. There were a couple of times when I spotted the missing ring in the cab. He had to ask the uncle to make a detour back home to fetch the ring.

I was angry, very angry....From being angry, I had to be rational and learn to come and stand by your side. It was difficult. Whenever I thought about the careless way you treated the ring while it was still with you, I had to restrain myself from using it as a verbal weapon to hurt you and send you on a guilt trip.

Yes, you lost the wedding ring. What's the next step? Tell me, explain to me. Don't just tell me you'll get a new one. When??? Don't just keep quiet.....

I hope you'll learn this lesson of taking good care of your new wedding band that you bought for yourself. Be it tarnished, corroded, scratched, acid-burned or whatever, just wear it.

Your colleague bought the exact ring as us. You know why? Because they had never seen how your wedding band looked like. Now, I won't be surprised if your colleague was mistaken as your wife.

Neuro-vestibular neuritis

I ain't preggie. Went back for checkup yesterday and the doctor's prognosis was confirmed. I am getting better by the day, didnt feel as dizzy when I got of the cab this morning. But staring at one object for too long, for eg PC monitor, does make me lightheaded. Now I need to remind myself not to get off the bed too fast.

I found out more about this condition online.

'How might vestibular neuritis affect my life ?
You will probably be unable to work for one or two weeks. You may be left with some minor sensitivity to head motion which will persist for several years, and may reduce your ability to perform athletic activities such as racquetball, volleyball and similar activities. After the acute phase is over, for a moderate deficit, falls are no more likely than in persons of your age without vestibular deficit (Herdman et al, 2000). Persons in certain occupations, such as pilots, may have a greater long term impact (Shupak et al, 2003).
You may also have mild problems with your thinking. Even in persons who are well compensated, sensory integration seems to require more attention in persons with vestibular lesions than normal subjects (Redfern et al, 2003).'

Mmmm, I realise my thinking processes/reactions are a little retarded. Hopefully it's only temporary.

These two weeks of bills chalked up to $200, thankful that the company covers me for that. Imagine, I can buy at least 2 pairs of Birkies with $200.......

For now, no badminton or tennis for me. Shopping shouldn't be a problem, if I browse gingerly and not turn my head too fast when I spot something that catches my fancy. I am also quite happy with couching in front of the telly. CSI, Amazing Race 9, chinese variety shows, Globe Trekker, Thirsty Traveller....ask me...I watched them all during my waking hours last week. Not forgetting my 'personal butler' who will see to my needs and ensure that household chores are done. *Wahahahhaa*

Spinning round and round

Don't know how in the world I came down with this head-spinning and nauseating condition. Ha! The doctor even requested for a pregnancy test. Even HR asked me this 'personal question'. Absurd or what.....

If I lie down, get up or turn my head too fast, the entire room goes into a spin. When the doctor asked me how I felt, I said, I felt like I am living outside my body.' They smiled. Very funny, huh?! It's like the feeling you have when you get high from alcohol. You are conscious or so I think I am conscious and sober enough, but somehow I cannot control my voluntary functions.

On Monday early morning, I got out of bed and swaggered like a drunkard. ZM thought I was being clumsy but no, I couldn't walk straight and I just plonked onto the toilet seat. Which was why we went down to A&E immediately that morning.

(Virus virus, you always get the blame when the docs can't figure out what's wrong. For this, you have my sympathy.)

They wanted me to present at the meeting. I would if I could. But they seemed to take my condition lightly, thinking I'll be back to work in time for the meeting. I hoped my presence on Tuesday said it all.

During dinner the same day, Mum asked me why didnt I choose a civil service job. 'Look at their medical benefits and pro-family stance. It's good for you in the long run.' I started my first job with them and that was the reason why I shyed away from civil service.

And I know too, how difficult the workload would be(or rather how much patience would be needed) if me or my dear co-worker, were to 'meet with any accident'. *touchwood touchwood*

Dad is supposed to be discharged this Friday, but now doc says his blood glucose level keeps flunctuating. No home sweet home. It's been more than a month since he was admitted into hospital. Initially there were a lot of visitors. Now there's Mum, ZM and me. Stan comes by when he is not working. Grandma visits during the weekends. I wonder if Dad is bored in the hospital. But he has made some friends and is strong to walk about to buy newspapers. The 42" plasma TV has also became his new companion.

Grandma scared us last weekend. She complained of tiredness and Uncle brought her to the hospital. We thought her platelet count had dipped again. Thankfully, she was fine and was sent home to rest.

Now I pray that ZM's dad will take good care of himself.

Excerpt of a Vday email I received from a dear friend

It touches my heart to have dear people at various times of my life
Standing by me and walking along with me.
And I truly wish that when I was by your side,
the truth in friendship and love we ever shared had touched you too.

Some people do ask,
"why bother asking about people who are history in our lives?"
To me, the fact that people have become history simply means,
this person has left special moments in the history of my life.

Wanting to know how friends are doing,
Is simply wishing to care for them,
and keep that little update of their lives rather than chuck them in the "history" compartment at the hidden back of our minds.
Everyone's living very different lives of our own,
but it simply brings a smile to know that loved ones are doing fine.

Life's so unpredictable,
I wouldn't know when is the day I take my last breath,
Therefore it would nice to put a smile on your faces when I still can,
Because you've put one on mine.
I thank God for blessing my life with all of you!

Have I lost a friend?

Initially I brushed it off by trying not to think about it. Every day I would think of reasons why you are not talking to us. I still can't figure out why.Why are you ignoring us? I felt angry at first. What happened that could not withstand the test of friendship?
Please tell me. I am willing to listen and try to resolve the
issue/s. I am still hoping that we can salvage this friendship. Unless you don't want this friendship anymore. I will back off then........

"This is an entry I kept as draft since 6 Jan 2006. The answer is very obvious to me now. ~15 Feb 2006~"