Last post of 2012

Woohoo, one hour to go before I knock off on this Friday. I'll drop some thoughts for the year before 2013 rolls in.

And as  most of my colleagues are clearing leave, the office headcount is at half-strength. Old birds are not around to spy on what we surf on. Plus I've been taken off casework and I've cleared most of the outstanding reports before I go on long leave come Feb 2013.

Let me start on:

1. Work

I joined the new company in Aug 2011. Training took more than 6 months and I was only qualified to take on casework in Apr 2012, which coincided with the move to the new satellite lab.

Learning curve is very steep and people here have zero tolerance for mistakes. They are not forgiving nor polite as my ex-bosses. I learned things the hard way. I was being told off, even had to kena no-holds-barred censures.

 If they like you, they can overlook any mistakes - big or small - you make. But if they didn't like you, any nitty gritty boo-boo would be amplified.

In the beginning, I was easily affected and felt I was certainly  targeted at, condemned, blacklisted. Am I inadequate? Why didn't I check and recheck my drafts? What have I done wrong to deserve this kind of stinky attitude? Why can't they cut newbies some slack? No humans are 100% error-free.

I have since learned to take these unpleasant, disturbing incidents in my stride. All in a day's work. This is the way they work. The seniors used to suffer more brunt from the boss.

It's a good thing they don't come to the satellite lab often enough for me to be stressed up.

This end of year is good and rather stress-free when they are away clearing last year's leave. Mind you, they haven't touched this year's leave yet.

After a few run-downs by the bosses, I am beginning to grasp how they review reports and I think I should do better in my job. Hope I won't forget the learned points after I come back from the long leave.......which brings me to next point.....

2. New addition

I am now into the 31st week.

It had been a bumpy year, but I also realise who my true friends are. Those who are here for me - offered assurances, support, concern - when the journey got tough.

ZM didn't have it easy too. Basically, he took over settling Eunice while I just plonked on the bed after showering.Wash her bottles, take out her soiled clothes, pack fresh clothes, iron her uniform, dry her hair, read bedtime stories and bring her to bed. Oops, the last one sounds kinda wrong. Haha.

After a long wait, I was confirmed positive on 26 June 2012. Towards the end of the first trimester, the baby was assessed to have higher risk of Down's Syndrome. False positive rates were high and I kept telling myself baby was going to be fine. That was just psycho-ing myself. I couldn't shake off the unsettling feeling.

Although I put on a strong front, I cried to sleep sometimes. Hoping for the best, but what if........it turned out to be....? We went through so much to get a BFP. I questioned God why He had to put me through trial after trial.

I went ahead to do CVS. Wanted to get over and done with the nerve-wrecking delicate procedure. I braced myself and prayed very hard cos my baby's life was in the hands of the doctor. Alas, the first attempt was unsuccessful as the placental position predisposed a high risk to the procedure. I nearly shook my fist at God. God, why why why? Why do you have to do this to me???

I went back to the clinic in the following week. This time round, the placenta shifted and posed no risk to baby. Prof Yeo was glad he waited for another week. At the same time, Eunice was my pillar of strength. The consultations were getting too frequent and ZM couldn't get away. Eunice was the one who accompanied me.

Waited anxiously for 14 working days for the CVS result and baby turned out normal. The bonus is foetus has XY chromosomes!

After going through this ordeal, the diagnosis at week 26 that I have gestational diabetes didn't really affect me that much any more. Good for weight control too.

We have booked the OT and doctor for baby's arrival. So until then.......

Going to knock off now and bond a lil with Eunice by taking the MRT to Jurong Point to meet ZM. Going to prepare Hokkien Prawn Noodle soup for tomorrow's gathering.

Have a blessed 2013 ahead!